Escape from Desolation City
by The Deer Lord
Summary: An initially AU fic. Implied Betty/Finn in first chapter, then obvious in second chapter. Two-shot.
1. Chapter 1

**Starts out as an AU.**

Life was happy. Simon would call me every day checking on me, and I was good. We were to be married in 6 months, and I couldn't wait to wear that beautiful dress that I had in my closet. He would serenade me from east to west, from north to south, and from up to down. He was perfect.

Fast forward a month later: He still called me 95% of the days, giving me blow kisses and 'I love you' messages galore. I felt like the happiest woman, ever! He was such a good guy to me. He helped the kids at school, he was smart, he was a scientist just like me, et cetera! Awesome!

Days came and went where things were not all right. Sometimes Simon would be a little irritable or grumpy. I gave him blow kisses back to cheer him up though. I'd give him sweet messages and meet him for a date.

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She was growing quite clingy to me. She'd bombard me with all these messages. At work, I caught the eye of a hot chick that always flirted with me. I silently planned to meet her. I would wake up earlier than usual and have a secret rendezvous.

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I curled up in bed. I always slept in a fetal position, because of my hidden insecurity. I always worried about Simon. I don't know what I would do if he ditched me.

"_Betty Grof…" A feminine voice called out._

"_Who are you?"_

"_The weenie knows my name, but you can call me the Mistress of Fate."_

"_Hmm… Mistress of Fate that is?"_

"_Yep, I know it's lame, but whatever."_

**For now it's alright **

**There's good love in sight**

** But is good love true?**

_**It may fly away from you**_

_**But destiny always contains**_

_**A purpose to remain**_

_**May your fate**_

_**Choose your date**_

_May your fate choose your date? That's so corny!_

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I met with the woman at her house at about 3:30 AM.

"Oh hey sexy…"

"Look who's looking sharp…"

"Yeah man… What's in that notebook?"

"Just some wish-fulfillment fantasies in there…"

"Like?"

"Kidnapping princesses… Wedding them all…"

"That's epic dude."

"Thank you…" I smooch her lips.

"The hot guy kisses the sexy chick!"

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I got up and headed for my awesome job just an hour after Simon usually does. I left at 5:00 AM.

My day was normal, except I noticed that he was bantering with that good-looking girl that he worked with. I blew it off and thought 'sheesh, Simon is the best…'

He seemed antsier today, but I didn't bother about it. It was just one of his wacky days.

He headed back to his house after visiting me for a few hours.

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The hot woman was at my house waiting for me.

"Hey sexy."

"What's up with the epic stud?"

"Betty doesn't know at all…"

"Good sir. I have a secret to tell you…"

"What is it, hottie?"

"I can grant your every wish."

"You can grant my every wish?"

"Yes, stud. Just sit in that chair…" It looked alone. Freakishly alone.

I still sat in it.

"One: Princesses from all over the place. Two: All the money in the world. Three: To have Betty sent to another dimension."

(Hottie's POV)

I can sense his enthusiasm. He's so selfish, it's making me burst. He's the perfect bait for my magic spell. I will give him all of that. The catch: He'll become the Lich from the old days. But so much more powerful.

I cast the black spell upon him. Money falls from the sky, landing all around him. Many different-colored princesses appeared around him. He was gushing. The Betty wish was a one with a timer on it. But I cast this foul spell that caused him to transform into this foul, skeleton-faced beast.

"By my bidding, destroy the world!"

"I will obey your command, Mistress."

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A sense of fear lingered on me when I tried to sleep. I kept sensing something bad around me. Like something magical. Wicked. Evil.

"Ahahahaha!" A witch appeared in front of my bed, looking at me with these jet black eyes. I was paralyzed in fear. "Simon never loved you. He was my tool for destroying your world!"

"L-l-l-lies!" I mutter, shaking.

"He told me that he loved me… He was so antsy because he didn't want to reveal his affair!" She chanted.

"Is this true?" I asked, scared.

"Of course, dear Betty Grof. You were so fooled. But not everything has to be bad. You are so lucky. Simon wished for your escape from this doomed time continuum."

"Get out!"

"If you wish…" The icy-blue, white-haired witch disappeared into thin air.

Oh my gosh. I curled up shaking and trembling. I cried.

"_Your life isn't over, girl."_

"_It's not?"_

"_No way… Your destiny carries on for a long time forward."_

"_How?"_

"_It's a mystery only revealed once you meet me face to face."_

"_Just who are you?"_

"_The weenie's best friend. Also immortal. I cannot die. But I cannot live."_

_I looked at her. She had a pair of red fang bites and pale gray skin. She had brilliant indigo hair._

"_May I sing you a song?" She asked while floating._

**Doom might rip you apart**

_**But it might soothe your heart**_

_**Because destiny holds all**_

_**Destiny shows you its call**_

_**It calls you over, through the void**_

_**Through the void, through the vo-o-oid**_

_**To a land of freakish wonders**_

_**To a land once torn asunder**_

_**To a land full of princesses**_

_**To a place of eternal recess**_

_**A land distant from your reality**_

_**But a place where you find sanity**_

_**But the rest of your soul**_

_**Where there now is a hole**_

_**Is waiting for you over there**_

_**I'll demonstrate where**_

"_May you explain this mystery?"_

"_You'll eventually like it. But you'll have to adjust. The weenie is waiting for you."_

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That morning, chaos ran free. I kept hearing voices that called, 'In the forest…' I got up and forgot breakfast. There was no time. This horrid creature was firing green poison blasts everywhere. I snuck away as it was destroying my hometown.

The forest looked more inviting than usual. I thought I could see rainbows and funky colors dotting the landscape.

Suddenly, this random portal opened up before me. I mindlessly hopped in.

I appeared in a living room, in a tree house. I heard friendly voices…

"I'm excited to meet Betty, Marcy!" Me?

"I'm glad weenie… I had this tugging in me that told me to save this poor soul."

"An alternate Betty Grof?"

"Yea exactly… It's lame, but that what happens when a half-demon, half-vampire actually cares for someone."

"Hello?" I ask without direction.

"Who's that, Marcy?"

"That's her… Let's surprise her… BOOGALOOGA!" I saw this horrifying face, then it turned normal again.

"Gah! Who are you? Were you in my dream?"

"Yea… Sorry for invading, girl. Just had to save your butt."

"What happened to my universe?"

"Sadly, everyone is already dead. You're the last human of that continuum."

"What happens if I meet myself here?"

"Nothing. Just craziness and identity confusion."

"Bro, this chick looks sharp…"

"Jake, she's not my girlfriend!"

"Just messing with ya man…" I saw this talking dog?

"You're… a talking dog?"

"Yeah, name's Jake. Wanna shake my paw?"

"Um… Sure." Shaking his paw was funky alright.

When I set my eyes upon the boy with the bear hat, I was sold. He was so adorable. He was like, 16?

"Hello! Finn is in the house!"

"That's your name?"

"Finn Mertens…" That name in itself was really cute.

"Mistress of Fate…"

"Betty, her name is Marceline, by the way."

"Marceline… Is that the weenie you were talking about."

"Yea girl. He's gonna fall in love with you, get married, and you'll have a great family."

"Um… Okay." I blushed a little. Finn blushed BIG TIME.

"Marcy… Come on! That's so embarrassing…"

"Weenie, it's true…" She chuckled. "Betty and Finn in a tree…"

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G…" Jake finished.

"Betty. They always do that." He said, blushing. "You're blushing."

"Of course." I say sarcastically.

"Are you like 35 years old?"

"23. Are you calling me old?"

"No!" Finn replied. "…maybe. But I'm totes kidding…"

He was the same height as me. It made me feel younger.

"Wanna hang with my bros?"

"Sure…" He led me to his porch, and we sat down.

R &R! Romantic hints…


	2. Chapter 2

**The legit sequel! **

"_Wanna hang with my bros?"_

"_Sure…" He led me to his porch, and we sat down._

"Betty, I already have a math girlfriend…" Phew…

"What's her name?"

"Princess Phoebe Flame… Yes, she's a fire girl… We're both 17… She broke up with me once but now everything is good…"

"She's like burning hot, right?"

"Totes! I have to wear this awesome sauce necklace just to touch her. Makes it all the more special… And she's hot, if you know what I mean…"

"Hey Betty… This whole 'you marrying weenie prophecy' was made up…" Marceline laughed.

"Guess you convinced me good…"

"I seriously had to, sis. You would'a been dead!"

"Yea… You telepathically told me to enter that forest."

"Had to. You would've been fried toast."

"Where's my world now?" I asked curiously.

"Toast. Your world's Lich killed everyone…"

"Why does the Lich kill people?"

"Because he does. He lives to see all men die. Including you."

"Is the Lich here as well?"

"Used to be. Gotta thank the weenie for his death."

"He of all people killed that unstoppable god beast?"

"Glob-beast, Betty. Oh. He was a _god_-beast in your world, right?"

"Exactly. And why don't you feed on us? You're a vampire!"

"I drink red!" She stuck her tongue out. She picked up an apple and sucked the red with her fangs. It was now a pale green. "Eat it…"

"It doesn't look right!"

"It tastes right… I just sucked the color…"

I crunched into the apple. Good as ever. "How do you do that?!"

"Vampire specialties…" I noticed her umbrella for the first time.

"Why do you wear an umbrella?"

"The Sun will burn me up within minutes if I don't!"

"Oh okay… So vampires do burn up in the sun, instead of shimmering, like that dumb movie involving that actress that cannot act and that teen heartthrob… Haha…" I mentioned the dreaded movie that started with a T.

"I still manage… Only need it when outside."

"Bro, sis, and Betty! P-Bubs invited us to the Royal Ball!"

"Who's P-Bubs?"

"Princess Bubblegum… My bro used to have a serious crush on her…"

"He says that he has a hot girlfriend now…"

"Yeah… He was the last human. So he found this burning fire elemental and fell for her."

"What's a Fire Elemental?"

"A person made of fire. They literally cannot touch each other without Finn's necklace. He always has that."

"He must be a lucky boy…"

"That's my bro for ya… Hey, we gotta go!" Jake dragged me along.

(At PB's ball…)

I saw Finn dance with the Flame Princess. She was very cute, for a ball of fire. Marceline stood off to the side strumming her bass guitar. She always seemed a bit depressed, but kept her cool constantly. Jake was dancing with this rainbow, stretchy unicorn.

My goodness was this world weird…

Suddenly, a black figure appeared within the room, walking towards Princess Bubblegum with a swaggering stride.

"Greetings, Princess." He bows his head.

"Welcome, Night Prince, to the Bubblegum Ball."

"It is my honor to dance with your Highness."

"Oh?" I saw her blush. She took his hand and awkwardly danced for a few minutes, before getting into the groove.

"You're a fine princess. Fine indeed." He played with her gummy hair.

"Thank you, mister." She blushed again.

"May I do a favor?"

"What?" He kissed her.

I turned to see Finn and Flame Princess sitting on the bench talking about something that I couldn't make out.

"I can't guarantee us…" I heard her say.

"What do you mean, Phoebe?"

"Enjoy it as long as you can."

A week later, Finn gave me the grim as heck news.

"Arranged marriage?! Come on! I love her to bits!"

"You're not a prince, so it wasn't exactly guaranteed, but you still have me."

"You're not my girlfriend." He fought back tears.

"Forget about the 'girlfriend' title for a while."

"Okay… I'll trust you Betty."

I genuinely smiled and hugged him. He was unaware that I was blushing myself. His arms around my waist felt so good.

"Okay… A little too intimate there."

"Huh, a little too intimate…" My cheeks were pink.

"I totes see that you liked it…"

"Not the way you think I did…"

He just crossed his arms. I blushed more.

When Finn departed, Jake came up to me with this all-knowing grin.

"Betty, I saw the way you looked at my bro."

"What? I don't like him like that!"

"Face it, sister. You can't control whom you crush on. And he's all blue now, cuz of FP's arranged marriage… Go talk to my bro."

"Alright." He gave me an wink, which irritated me.

"Hey Finn. You ok?"

"I'm just fine." He lied.

"You're not fine." I patted his shoulder.

"Kinda sad that she's gone."

"I know… Can I help?"

"How?" He replied, in low spirits.

"Wanna… Um… dance?"

"So you do like me…" He replied.

"Kinda yea." I blushed.

He took my hands and intertwined them with mine. A rush of good feelings went right into my head. I blushed hard. The way that he was looking at me… Oh wow. We spun around each other gracefully, keeping our eyes locked onto each other's. He then wrapped his right arm around my waist, spinning me around in a 180-degree turn. My back was against him now. He then wrapped his arms around my waist, sending shivers up my spine. I instinctually leaned my head against his neck, somewhat nuzzling him.

"You're really liking this, aren't you?" He asked, in a slightly shy manner.

"Mhm…" I mumbled.

He then spun me around again. Now I was facing him. He wrapped his arms around my waist, bringing me closer. I felt inclined to wrap my arms around his neck. I did in a few moments.

"Up close, you're beautiful." He blurted, making my cheeks fire up.

"Um thank you?" He pulled me in for a brief kiss. I felt my brain shutting down. "Wow, you're an awesome kisser…" Without thought, he kissed me again, but didn't relent. I returned it full force.

(Jake's POV)

"It's an algebraic flameout!" I said.

"I'm kinda jealous man. I didn't know the weenie was this good of a kisser."

"Your 'No Tongue' rule has probs been broken too many times…"

"Exactly man. Lemme sing a song…"

**You played in the beginner's game**

**But you were a born professional**

**You just hadn't had the right dame**

**But now it's quite darn official**

**The weenie has now scored big time**

**And the lady gives him her all**

**He didn't even have to spend a dime**

**To hear her divine, celestial call**

**Oh Finn, you're a hotbod sexy man!**

**And your lady is too beautiful!**

**You didn't even need a stupid plan**

**Cuz your life is just too bountiful!**

**I am always jealous of you, Finn**

**You get the lady; I have no man**

**I always lose and you always win**

**I need a lot of feats; you only need a tan**

**I never have friends that last**

**Because I am an immortal freak**

**The best always becomes the past**

**And I keep calling myself weak**

**I'll see you cry**

**I'll see you die**

**I'll see myself cry**

**But I cannot die**

"You ok, Marceline?"

"I'm ok."

"Don't forget, it's Wish Your Luck Day!"

"Okay… I wish my life had some sort of meaning!"

Prince Gumball appears out of a portal, greeting Marceline.

"Bubba!" Marceline affectionately hugs him.

"I knew I would see you again. Lemonsnatch took over the throne, because she thought I was lame…"

"Come stay with us, Gum." He kissed her immediately.

She head hearts on her eyes. They ended up kissing repeatedly.

Enough romance for the night, sissies and bros…

R & R, eager fans!


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